Teeth

Director: Mitchell Lichtenstein
Starring: Jess Weixler, John Hensley
Year: 2007
Country: United States
WEIRD SCORE: 7/10

It gets weird when: An innocent children’s game of I’ll show you mine if you show me yours goes awkwardly wrong.

A couple of years back I was roaming the isles of my favourite video rental store in downtown Toronto called Queen Video (yes I still find the joy in renting). On the shelf I saw a film with an intriguing poster and an even more alluring title- a film from 2007 called Teeth. Letting my curiosity get the best of me, as I always do, I grabbed it off the shelf not bothering to read the synopsis, paid for the rental and headed straight out the door. What came next was quite the film watching experience, and Teeth soon became a movie I’ve recommended to only a select few.

Ahhh the perils of puberty. It’s hard on everybody. Every woman can relate to what our protagonist Dawn experiences in the film. The hormones, the awkwardness, the confusion, the second pair of teeth she discovers in her…HOLD ON…wait…is that a real thing? That can’t be a real thing! You can picture me here, jaw dropped, pausing the movie and immediately googling. I’ll leave this research and revelation up to you if you decide to watch the film. Teeth follows the story of Dawn (played by Jess Weixler), an innocent and naive teenager who’s only mission is to live pure and untainted in the eyes of the lord. That is until one day Dawn meets Toby (played by Hale Appleman) and the two share a very traumatic tryst by a waterfall. And you thought your first time was bad. Dawn discovers she has…a curse… or a blessing, that’s up to you as a viewer to decide.

The film is a mix of horror, comedy and drama that tackles tough subject matter such as consent and male violence. The symbolism is far from subtle and the imagery gets overtly gruesome as Jess encounters male characters that threaten her safety. Whether or not you find this film effective in bringing some of these issues to light, will really be a matter of taste and preference of style and storytelling. There are several very memorable scenes, featuring some brother/sister sexual tension that would make any family dinner feel uncomfortable, and an unforgettable trip to the gynaecologist to keep you cringing.

Teeth isn’t for everyone. If you don’t have a weak stomach and you don’t mind a dark satirical film with a strong message, give it watch. Worst case scenario you will look back on your awkward teenage years and realize the acne, first times, and breakups all pale in comparison to the journey Dawn takes as the most unusual female vigilante I have ever seen on film.

It will get weird if you talk about this movie: In the middle of a pap smear, a dental consultation, your mom’s tupperware party.